just call me “miss manners”

(old post from fiji, sorry!)

every so often, in the interest of keeping the budget balanced (particularly in more expensive cities like singapore, or kunming, or fiji), j and i have elected to stay in dormitory accomodation. and although i am usually a good decade older than many of the other occupants (though by no means all) i’m not usually bothered by certain immaturities. after all, i was 21 too, not so long ago. howwver i feel the need to take this opportunity to pass along a few choice words of wisdom, which will serve them well in their future travels. let’s just call it “dorm etiquette”.

1. please do not leave your mobile on – no one wants to be woken to “auld lang syne” when your drunken mate from london rings you at 3 am.

2. do not fart. it’s not funny. if you are unable to refrain from farting in public, shared accomodation is not for you. if others fart in their sleep, giggling is uncalled for. again, it’s not funny. if you think farting is funny, shared accomodation is not for you.

3. if you know that you snore like an outboard motor, please be kind and do not inflict this on other strangers (who you may find yourself trying to score with later). find another snorer and share the costs of a room.

4. don’t try to score – this is not the set of “big brother”.

5. if you set your alarm, wake up and turn the damn thing off.

6. dorms are for sleeping only – not partying. see rule # 4.

7. do not try to pack at dawn – you’re not nearly as quiet as you think you are.

8. if you’re in late or out early, for god’s sake, *do not turn on the light*. learn to un/dress in the dark like every one else. if this is not a skill you have mastered, shared accomodation is not for you.

9. the unwritten law of dorms is that you don’t look while others are dressing. don’t be a perv. if you’ve never seen the opposite sex naked, then you’re too young for the dorms.

10. whatever you do, for god’s sake, *don’t turn on the light*! you will be murdered in your sleep. don’t say i didn’t try to warn you.

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