1. never take soap or toilet paper for granted

2. deet is useless – mozzies bite

3. always count your change

4. never trust the motives of someone who tries to sell you their service. when someone tries to solicit you (even if they’re offering something you need) turn them down and ask someone else yourself. this particularly applies to taxis and hotels.

5. take other travellers’ advice with a grain of salt – then go see for yourself and form your own opinion

6. write things down

7. always apologise before long journeys – they’re miserable enough without bickering

8. never pass up an opportunity to get wet or dirty

9. clothes always take longer to dry than you think

10. books are priceless – and literacy is an incredible gift

11. leeches suck

12. when you have to encounter or deal with something unavoidably disgusting, deliberate mental denial goes a long way… (”I’m going to pretend that never happened.”)

13. transportation may be easier now than it has ever been in the history of mankind, but when you want to be with your family yesterday, even one mile is a mile too far.

ugh – those linen “fisherman pants” that backpackers seem to love. they make the wearer look like they’re walking around with a load in their undies.

j’s been sick since we hit luang prabang – fever, chills, nausea, aches. which only becomes worrisome when you remember the guidebook saying “healthcare in laos is so poor as to be virtually non-existant” and recommending that for anything more serious than a stomach bug, you immediately hop the next flight to bangkok for medical attention.

you never think about it until your imagination starts wondering if this could be something more serious. thankfully we have the resources to *get* on the next plane, if need be. but it gives a concerned wife a sleepless night, until the next morning she finds the fever has broken, thank god.

becoming strangely attached to having a myriad of geckos in my bedroom

it’s just another bus trip, so similar to so many others, yet i’m once again amazed by what i see out my window. changing landscapes of flat fields or rolling mountains. banana plantations and ramshackle villages scroll by. farmers, schoolchildren, and elders – farms, schools and cemetaries. rivers and mango trees. it’s all so vastly different from my everyday world, and yet somehow, it has become my momentary everyday. and the people i watch go past – it is their everyday. these landscapes are not mine to keep, but to glimpse only as they flash by. these vignettes will soon be gone from view, existing only in my memory, soon enough. and yet, sometimes i forget this is not my ordinary world. i forget that this is extra-ordinary.

but i could watch it go by forever.

the most useful things i have packed, to date:

- anti-bacterial hand gel. j, who originally scoffed at the idea, has since apologised profusely, after god knows how many atrocious bus stop toilets and no soap anywhere in sight.

- my ipod travel charger. worth its weight in gold.

- my hooded fleece. invaluable on bus trips, train trips, and protecting me from dodgy headrests.

most useless things i packed, to date:

-travel skirt. never worn, very practical but too frumpy.

-even the *minute* amount of makeup i brought. i assumed there would be days i’d still want to “look nice”. i stopped caring after about day 10.

-travel money belt. never used. see “daybag” below.

useful things picked up along the way:

-travel speakers. cost 5 pounds. ambiance in charmless hotel rooms… priceless.

-sarong. it’s a beach blanket/cover up/top sheet (i cannot sleep without a top sheet, and much like hot water showers, those are nowhere to be found in s.e.a.)

single most useful item: my messenger bag. all items of value (camera/ipod/wallet/passport/tickets) are on my body at all times. also permanently in the day bag are toilet paper, hand gel, lip balm, small notebook (for tracking expenses), pens, and guidebook. optional weather-dependent items are umbrella, bandana, suncream. for journeys also included are: paperback novel, book light, large notebook (for writing), fleece jumper, and assorted snacks/water. that bag is my life – much more important than my pack, and far more versatile.

the abuse and exploitation of the elephants i’ve seen thus far really just breaks my heart. i can’t take it. babies separated from their mommas in the jungle and paraded through the streets of bangkok, crying piteously. elephants chained by the leg in the hot sun, waiting for dumbass ignorant tourists to ride them like common pack mules, being beaten with sticks.

elephants are not domesticated, nor do they exist for our amusement. it kills me to see them treated that way. i really can’t take it.

in spite of my personal disdain for the mcdonald’s chain of restaurants (and i use that terminology loosely), i have come to discover that it is sometimes a necessary evil for the world traveller. i have, in fact, been in more mcdonald’s in the past 6 weeks than i have in the previous six years (though i am quick to point out that we’ve only actually eaten there once). there are several reasons for this state of affairs. one: it is often the only thing open 24 hours a day. so when a bus dumps you off on khao san road at 5am, and there’s no place else to go, you can kill several hours in relative comfort for the price of a small beverage. two: it always has a bathroom – the importance of this factor cannot be overstated. you are assured access to a toilet (the cleanliness of which is highly varaible, and the western version is likely to have been abused by those in asia who don’t understand the seat is for *sitting* – still, a toilet nonetheless) for the same price of the aforementioned beverage. they *have* to let you use it. thirdly: it always serves coffee. something more difficult in countries where the bean makes a limited appearance, such as china. and finally: they always have a picture menu to point at. no matter how bad the communication difficulties, “point, pray and pay” is easier in mickey d’s than anywhere else.

i hate to admit it, but there’s a plus side to the globalisation phenomenon, and ronald mcdonald aptly illustrates just why he’s so successful world-wide.

i still think the clown’s a freak, though.

there are some experiences so surreal, that the full impact of the whole thing just quite defies description. for example, i cannot adequately convey to you what it is like to be on a jumbo sleeper bus which is completely decked out from stem to stern in neon purple and hot pink velour quilting and dust ruffles, in seats resembling plush dentist chairs, whilst being serenaded by horrifically schmaltzy thai pop at top volume. it’s like “finding nemo” meets a bad 70’s disco inside a giant lounge-mobile.

utterly bizarre.

that’s me. the past few weeks have only served to confirm wha i already knew – I am meant for hot climates. i’m at my best tan, sweaty and barefoot and the heat energises me.

my attachment to the snow is purely sentimental.